Monkey Eat My Boob

January 26, 2012

Overheard at the Evans Household

Pearson: Mom, you know, Dusty has a broken leg.

Mom: Really? What happened?

Pearson: Well, he was playing baseball with the other horses and...

Pearson: You know Mom, Dad is going to by me a big space ship, and bring it home in a big box.

Mom: Oh really?

Pearson: Yes. And I'm going to give Arielle a ride back to France when it's time for her to go home - in my space ship. It goes fast.

(he's currently taking space ship reservations from all of the children)

Dad: Where did you come up with that idea?

Pearson: I just thunk it by myself.

(Mom goes in to get the babies out of their cribs in the morning, Becket has been crying.)

V-R: Becket cry because he miss me. (to Becket) - No worry Becket, I coming!

(this conversation happens about 20 times a day..)

Mom: Becket, do you want to <do something / eat something>?

Becket: Yeah, Sure!

(V-R after finding my shoes in the hallway)

V-R: Mommy! Shoes go closet, not here. That naughty.

Linnea: Mom, are you and Daddy twins?

Mom: No, we're married.

Linnea: Oh, so you were twins before you got married?

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January 18, 2012

The birth of a life-long phobia

It was a rough morning. Kids had a hard time waking up, and Linnea in particular didn't like breakfast, didn't want me to comb her hair, didn't want to get in the car, etc. She was pretty much in tears all morning.

They were running a little late, and Linnea was walking very slowly to the car. I actually tapped her bottom, in an effort to get her to go faster. The tears continued.

She gets in the car, still crying, and I'm trying to buckle her into her car seat when she freaks out and whips off her boot. "There's something in my shoe! A spider!" (more crying).

I sigh, and figure I'd just humor her and empty out her boot. So I tap it a few times on the side of the car...nothing. These kids need to get more sleep- I think to myself. A few more taps...and a mouse jumps out!

I whip off her sock - she hasn't been bitten, but of course there are more tears as I tell her what happened. Hopefully she recovered before she got to school.

So, I feel terrible. She was probably walking slow because she could feel something in her shoe! I think we may not be keeping our boots in the garage anymore....

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November 28, 2011

A five-year-old's take on the armed forces...

P&L are playing Army Truck. They've arranged pillows on the ground with two drivers seats, and a long cab in the back. At the back of the "truck" there is a phone (a beaded necklace hanging on a lamp). Here is the scene that ensued:

Pearson: "The phone is ringing!"

Linnea: "Answer it quick, sir!" (seriously, she said 'sir')

(Pearson runs to answer the necklace/phone)

Pearson: "Hello?...Uh-huh...okay, we'll be right there."

(hangs up the phone, then turns to Linnea)

Pearson: "Linnea, another army truck just called...someone's having a birthday....we've got to get there fast...they're turning 20!"

Linnea: "O-Kay!" (runs over to the United states puzzle, points to a state) "It's in Uranus...we've got to hurry!"

(with that they "drive" away)

I think they're a little unclear on the concept.

Posted by Evans Family

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November 12, 2011

Becket and Chocolate

For a week or so, Becket kept getting very close to my face, pointing to my eyes, and saying, "Chocolate?". The first couple of times I actually found a mirror to make sure I didn't have chocolate on my face somewhere, and then just quizzically told him no, there's no chocolate. But he started to get insistent - which was really confusing to me each time it happened until one day we had this argument...

Becket: "Chocolate?" (pointing to my eye)

Mom: "No chocolate."

Becket: "Chocolate in eye"

Mom: "No, there's no chocolate in my eye."

Becket: "Yes, Chocolate! Chocolate Chip right there!"

Apparently this whole time he was talking about my pupils, and I never realized it. Of course, it's not limited to eyes either. Today in the shower he told me he had chocolate in his testicles as well...

Posted by Evans Family

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November 10, 2011

Oh Linnea...

Some of her more humorous quotes lately:

(in bed talking to Pearson after watching the yellow brick road scene from the Wizard of Oz).

Pearson: "The lion wasn't real Neah, was he?"

Linnea: "No, He had a person face. But the Tin-man, he was real." (nods enthusiastically).

(Before bed one evening)

Linnea: "Mommy- when is the next Halloween?"

(I count out the months for her)

Linnea: "Next year, Pearson and I are going to go trick or treating by ourselves. In the dark. But don't worry...we'll hold hands."

(yeah right Linnea, next I'll be leaving you to babysit...)

(trying to console Pearson after he injured his private area in a bike crash)

Linnea: "Don't worry Pearson...if you get back on your bike, and exercise a lot, the sun will come out faster, and your penis won't hurt any more."

(after going on a special walk with Dad to take photos...)

Dad: "Linnea, tell Mommy what I told you on our walk."

Linnea: "Daddy said that he will always love me, no matter what I do. Like if I'm bad, or good, he'll still love me. Or if I say mean things, like stupid-head, he'll still love me. Or even if I hit him really hard in the penis...he still loves me."

Dad: "Um...I did not say that last part."

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October 13, 2011

Pillow Talk

Tonight at bedtime, I'm cuddling with Linnea in her bed.

Linnea: "Mom, will you tell me about when Jesus sent the flood?" (well, not quite accurate, but I go with it)

Mom: "Well, once a long time ago, there was a prophet named Noah. The people who lived in the same town as Noah were very very bad. They didn't listen to what God said."

Linnea: (interrupting) "Like they didn't flush the toilet, or wipe their bums, or take a bath."

Mom: "Well, not exactly. They weren't nice to each other, they hurt each other."

Linnea: (very excitedly interrupting) "Yeah, they called each other names, like 'stupid', or 'stupid-head' and maybe they grabbed each others arms. Oh! They forgot to brush their hair!"

I love this little girl....

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September 14, 2011

The Ukulele

This year for his birthday Pearson asked for a Ukulele. Don't ask me where he came up with this idea - I think it's somehow connected to his wanting to vacation in Hawaii, but I'm not really sure. Anyways, I'm supportive of anything musical, so we got him one - or actually, our neighbor down the street gave us his old one.

Pearson LOVES it, walks around the house strumming it all the time. I've been trying to teach myself and him a few chords, but he's not really interested in learning it, he just wants to fool around with it right now - which is totally fine. However, he keeps fiddling with the tuners - so the thing is constantly out of tune, which drives me a little nuts. So about once a day, I borrow it, go to the piano and tune it. As I've learned, the strings to a ukulele are GCEA, or the notes to "My dog has fleas." I'm getting quite fast at tuning it, and after a minute or two, I can hand it back to him to play with some more.

Anyway, the other morning Pearson woke up particularly early, around 6:30am. I was working, but the rest of the house was asleep. I told Pearson that he had to be quiet because I was on a conference call, and I heard him take his ukulele in the other room and it sounded like he was quietly playing it. I couldn't do much to stop him, as I was giving a presentation in this conference call, so I just hoped that he was being pretty quiet with it, and nobody else would wake up.

No such luck. As I quickly discovered...Pearson had gone upstairs to the foot of my mothers bed and was serenading the dog, singing, "My dog has fleas..." over and over again at the top of his lungs. Soon the whole house was awake, including a quite confused little dog. :)

You know, I really enjoy this little boy...

Posted by Evans Family

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August 28, 2011

Birthday Quotes

P&L celebrated their 5th birthday this week. While I still am in disbelief that they could actually be five...they were clearly ready for this day. Here are some of our favorite quotes:

Dad: Linnea, stop doing that.

Linnea: Why? It's my birthday, I can do whatever I want!

(after blowing out all of his birthday candles on his cupcake)

Dad: What did you wish for Pearson?

Pearson: A cupcake!!

(at Costco picking up his birthday cake - to the receipt checker at the back door)

Pearson: Will you draw a picture of a rocket?

Checker: What's the magic word?

Pearson: Si-tu-plait? ("please" in French)

Checker: The magic word?

Pearson: Abracadabra?

A few run-downs:

Breakfast in bed requests: Pearson - Mac and Cheese, Linnea - Pizza

Lunch - picnic in St. Edwards Park where they received their NEW BIKES! Within minutes, they were "mountain biking" on adventure trails.

Favorite Presents - besides the bikes, Linnea got a little teary over her new hello kitty toothbrush, and has already dug into her card making supplies and sewing kit. Pearson is quite thrilled with his Ukulele, a new bat and ball, and has found hours of entertainment with the whoopee cushion his Canadian grandparents brought down (not happy with you Grandma Evans...)

Birthday Firsts - Kids had their first "friends" birthday party at Mounger Pool in Magnolia. They had fun swimming and were so thrilled to see their friends again after a few months of no school. The parents are quite pleased with their birthday manners...greeting people / thanking people / etc.

In all - a great birthday - they enjoyed themselves...and were a little disappointed to hear it won't come around again for a full year.

Posted by Evans Family

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July 5, 2011

Priorities

(on the way home from church)

Dad: "I am so tired, I'm going to sleep for a thousand years"

Linnea: "No, Dad... don't be silly - you'll miss dessert!"

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July 4, 2011

Installing Feminism in your daughters ... FAIL

Linnea is searching through the princess band-aids trying to find the right one.

Linnea: "Dad, do you like princesses?"

Dad: "No, not really."

Linnea: "Why? They are pretty, wear pretty dresses, have nice hair..."

Dad: "I think you're better than a princess. You can read, play the piano, ride a bike with pedals, take care of your little brother and sister...princesses can't do those things. You're better than a princess, I wish they made band-aids with your picture on them - I would wear that."

Linnea: "I tooted." (giggle-giggle)

Posted by Evans Family

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